Mmmm,tacos…. I digress.
Happy Valentine’s Day lovers and friends! I truly do love this idea of this holiday. I just wish greedy corporate America didn’t benefit from love. I also have to say..if everyday isn’t Valentine’s Day for you and yours…well…do you boo. I hope this doesn’t turn into how many cliches I can fit into into one post.
So with today coming it got me thinking a lot about relationships & dating & love & all of these things when you’re sick, or not. Anyone who’s follows me on social media and is my friend in real life (which most people while dual citizenship) know that I was dating someone. Anyone still curious what happened with that, watch out for the book! (Seriously)
I allowed someone to interrupt my greatness. I was managing post-cancer life and trying so hard to feel better (while slowly dying as I didn’t realize I had a bowel blockage). But still…all things considering…I was okay. When someone who seemed great wanted to be in my life, I thought…why not? I deserve happiness even if I am still not 100%. I ignored major red flags proceeded with NO caution. Things came to light (as they ALWAYS do) and there I was in the hospital with a severe kidney infection & a seriously broken heart. For an entire year, I had watched my previously healthy and beautiful body be mutilated and left with huge scars (and small). I had lost 30 pounds by the end of the year. For those who didn’t see pictures…I’m 5′ 8″. I weighed 106 pounds. I had to have a colostomy bag (google that). I felt like crap. I looked nothing like the me I loved and I didn’t feel good. Humpy dumpy had just fallen off the wall.
As I write this today, I feel great! Im gaining weight (finallyyyy), my hair is growing (oh..yeah…my hair had stopped growing), I have amazing people in my life and I’m surrounded by so much love. I just can’t help but wonder how much sooner I could have begun this process if I had remembered I’m my number 1 priority. My friends, and now you, know im so good at being the single girl. I love being single. I do whatever I want whenever I want. I can paint my nails 12 times a day & not have to worry about someone needy for attention breathing all heavy over me. I feel so absolutely free that my very existence is defiant. That doesn’t mean i don’t want love or don’t expect it will happen in a forever kind of way. Im just saying…I won’t allow anyone else to interrupt my greatness. Not right now. Actually not for another 1o.5 months. Yup! Single for a whole year is the plan. I may like someone…I may love someone…but if they can’t wait until 2018….BYE, FELICIA. Humpty Dumpty is under construction.
All that glitters isn’t gold, baby. Thats okay…hearts heal. Even if there’s no quick acting medicine – trust me I asked a few nurses. They say it takes half the time of a relationship to truly heal. I’ve found this to be 100% true and am thankful for very short relationships lol.
So to all my single girls and boys…do some squats, put on a face mask, dance in the mirror, post a selfie, do it for the ‘gram, but don’t forget to do it for you first.
SO MUCH LOVE!!!!!! XOXO -a